In a world of doom, gloom, and capitalism, the pursuit of being young is at the forefront of people’s minds. This pressure is highest for gay men—especially twinks.
Twink Death is the phenomenon describing the point in time when a gay man, who used to be a twink, can no longer be considered one due to aging. Popular celebrities who have gone through Twink Death include: Mike DeWine.
Luckily for Mike, there is hope! Sociologists are coining the new term, “Keebler Elf Birth” to describe the former. Keebler Elf Birth now pinpoints a new evolution in a gay man’s life where it’s socially acceptable to wear cobbler shoes and start balding!
No longer are the days where femboys are losing their boyish charm! The hasty natural progression from twink birth to twink death is truly astounding. However, now there’s hope.
We can now create a new beginning for Ohio’s governor, a new beginning for thousands of failing drag queens, and a new beginning for middle-aged straight women who need a gay best friend: Keebler Elf Birth.
Written by Jo Baldwin