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Pornograzine (2019)

Cap’n Crunch Sued After Blowjob Gone Wrong

Let’s be real: you know exactly where this article is going. I could give you context, but that wouldn’t do anything to assuage the visceral thought of that bushy mustache chomping down on a PhleshyPhallus™. Let’s just say the jig… Continue Reading →

Washed-Up Adult Actor Forced to Act in Oscar-Nominated Film to Make Ends Meet

HOLLYWOOD–The recent downturn of economic events has wreaked havoc on hard-working citizens all across America. With the stock market being the way it is (bad) and layoffs occurring at nearly every business, many Americans are struggling to get by. One… Continue Reading →

FANFICTION: Daddy Evolution Meets Daddy Relativity

Written by XxXtumblrDaddyPwenisUwUXxX 1951, Manhattan: Daddy Einstein turns on his thicc time portal and sashays into The Past. He is chasing true love. Cut to 1850, Galapagos Islands: Darwin Senpai is inside his sexy office, writing down his smart observations of animals. There is a… Continue Reading →

Whore-oscopes

Howdy, Astrologer Dave here! As we transition from Pisces to Aries season last March, remember that consistently crying three times a day is completely normal, no matter what your therapist says. Hope you like what the stars have to say… Continue Reading →

Finally: Feminist-Free Porn

Perhaps you’ve noticed movies making strides in the wrong direction. Movie studios have begun making unneeded pushes for diversity, which ends up hurting the integrity of the final product. It all started with that Ghostbusters reboot, and then strong female… Continue Reading →

Find Your Sexy Porno Name!

In celebration of March’s “Pornograzine,” we here at The Sundial wanted to try something new for you, our loyal, obedient readers. We wanted to allow you to actually participate in creating the laughs! And being the generous writers, editors, sodomites,… Continue Reading →

Moments In History: Five Hundred Years By The ’69s

1469: Christopher Columbus is controversially famous for having been the first European to successfully voyage to the Americas. Despite the debate over whether or not Columbus should be celebrated for his work, everyone likely knows the rhyme used to remember… Continue Reading →

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