1. A Desert Island
I’d like to start my Island Odyssey adventure on a desert Island. I feel like this will be one of my last opportunities to really rough it before I end up staring at my parent’s fridge wondering why my mom hasn’t bought me any food that I like to binge eat at 1:00 in the morning. I really want my skin to blister from the blazing sun and get sand in places I didn’t know could be uncomfortable to remind me that it’s not all that bad to be an embarrassment to your friends and family.

2. A Deserted Island
This is slightly preferable to a desert island. It doesn’t have to have any of the grueling temperature and sand requirements that a desert island has. The beach could be made of rocks for all I care. Most of these islands will be devoid of people, so an island people left behind will do me some good. Hopefully, there will be a fridge there or insurance I can mooch until I’m thrown into the horrible US health care system or have to move back in with my parents.

3. A Dessert Island
This is by far the most suitable island mentioned of the previous three. It’s especially preferable to staring longingly into the bowels of my parent’s fridge. It’s even the easiest to find. They have dessert islands at your local Chinese buffet. This island will have plenty of snacks like Little Debbie Oatmeal Cream Pies, or banana pudding. Eventually, I would get a tummy ache and leave the island and move back in with my parents because I am unable to find a job.

4. An Uninhabited Island
This could be either the dessert island (if I was the first person to find it) or it could be the desert island (presumably because most people hate to live in hot sandy places without any other people). There is some overlap in the types of islands. I want to be the first person to take a dump somewhere. This would give me a sense of accomplishment knowing I was able to be the first at something before I have to make the arduous journey home to my parents’ house.

5. An Abandoned Island
By definition, this island could be three of the four islands I visited before. It couldn’t be the uninhabited island because no one abandoned it yet. Or I could visit a new island that someone else left. This island reminds me the most of how I’ve been abandoned by an economy that should supposedly provide me with an entry level job that requires a reasonable amount of experience and pays me a living wage.

6. A Tropical Paradise
Ideally, I somehow made money visiting the other five islands as a professional island discoverer. The sandy greenbacks should be enough to afford some Dubai Island or a Sandals Resort. Either way, I would at least like to be a tourist on one of these Islands before I embarrass myself and my parents reluctantly let me move into their basement.

Written by Adam Hribar, Sundial Alumnus