-
If you add too much salt when making tomato sauce, add in half a potato and it will soak up the excess salt.
-
If you need to measure something and don’t have a ruler, the average dollar bill is about six inches long. If you don’t have any money, you’re out of luck.
-
To draw a perfect circle press your pinkie knuckle into the paper.
-
Playing classical music can make your plants grow faster. Also, killing a classical music composer and burying his body in your garden can provide your plants with essential nutrients.
-
If your coffee is too bitter, add in a pinch of salt. If you add too much salt, add in half a potato and it will soak up the excess salt.
-
If you want to buy some cocaine, buy it in crystalline form and not as powder, because it’s really easy for drug dealers to add stuff to powder, so your cocaine won’t be as pure.
-
If you’re tired of your headphone cables getting caught on door handles and stuff, try putting the cord inside your shirt. You can also prevent your headphones from getting tangled by wrapping them around a small object, like a pencil or a human finger or a potato.
-
If you want to kill someone, try putting ground-up glass in their food. It’s cheaper than poison and it’s hard to detect in an autopsy. It also mixes great with mashed potatoes.
-
You can open a wine bottle without a bottle opener by hitting it on a hard surface, like a table, or a wall, or the skull of a deceased classical music composer.
-
If you can’t remember someone’s name, steal their wallet and look at their driver’s license. This is also a nice way to make a little extra cash on the side.
- Finally, writing down your negative thoughts and putting them in a place no one will read them is scientifically proven to improve your bad mood.
-Travis Filicky, Senior Staff Member, and Hareesh Menon, Contributor