COLUMBUS, OH-Every college student knows that taking a Literature GE course means one thing; being at the academic mercy of a 28-year-old white guy in Mona Lisa socks. In one of the deepest crevices of Denney Hall, this seemingly innocuous English 2220 class is no different. Matthew Henderson had it all; A quirky disposition, unbridled enthusiasm, and questionable sexuality. To top it all off, this graduate student instructor calls Shakespeare “Bill” as if they were goddamn school chums.
Matthew is relentless in his quest to use colloquial terms to get business majors to connect with 16th Century literature. “Why did our pal little Bill characterize Shylock in a moderately sympathetic manner?” he probed to an unnerved crowd of former Little Bill fans.
He does not stop at merely subverting Shakespeare’s name. He also employed one of the most flawless devices in making Ohio youth adore prose; insisting that every relationship in the Shakespearean canon was laden with homoerotic subtext. “What’s the deal with our Buddy Boy Bill hitting us with that gay shit? From Egeus to Demetrius and Antonio to Bassanio, why do all of the male friends in these plays seemingly want to bone?” This query led to the greatest dodging of eye contact in recorded Ohio State History.
Will his undying attempts compel freshman who never stops talking about Calc and Chem to actually do their readings? Only time will tell. If not, at least his self-deprecating jokes about the uselessness of pursuing an English graduate degree will tickle the fancy of STEM kids for more years to come.
Written by Emmy Pratt, Staff Member