COLUMBUS – A viral video that has spread like wildfire on Twitter the past few days has caused major distress for Ohio State University student, Daniel Sherman. The video consists of a guy filming his friend rocking some white vans and yelling “Damn, Daniel!”
Following this trend, Sherman is disappointed that he can no longer wear his favorite white vans. “I hadn’t seen the video yet, so I was of course wearing my white vans to class,” Sherman stated while sitting cross-legged in order to hide his shoes. “I don’t know what to do now. Like, these are the only shoes I have and now I can’t even wear them without people yelling ‘Damn, Daniel’ at me. It’s embarrassing, my life is ruined. Stacy won’t even talk to me anymore until I get new shoes! She said she refuses to date a meme!” Sherman admitted as he confessed that he has considered changing his name in an attempt to rid himself of the joke. We asked Stacy why she decided to break up with Sherman following his ridicule and she explained, “I knew I had to break up with him before and that was just an excuse I came up with. It seemed better than ‘I had an affair with your brother last weekend’.” Intrigued at the situation, we asked Stacy why she made the decision to sleep with her boyfriend’s brother and, obviously, who was better in the sack. After a respectable amount of deliberation, Stacy’s verdict was that she slept with him because it was dark and when you squint he kinda looks like the guy from Teen Wolf. Ultimately, Daniel had more experience and they love each other so the passion put him above his brother. She feels terrible for what happened and would rather break up with Sherman now with a bad explanation than break his heart that way and ruin his relationship with his brother. She hopes that one day in the future, they will be able to move past it.
After our interview, Sherman went back to coloring in his favorite shoes with a black sharpie, but was discouraged when another student walked by yelling, “Damn, Daniel! Back at it again with the poorly colored black vans!”
-Lauren Moliterno, Senior Staff Member