Ryan Wires is a confused wanderer from an alternate universe, who uses the medium of “humor,” as it is apparently called, to cope with the vast differences between his home universe and this one. He writes short, highly realistic pieces set in his home universe, and wonders why no other publication accepts his serious writing. Currently, he is studying computer science in an attempt to create a device to return to his assigned family unit, but is having trouble finding pure enough exophorium for it. In the meantime, he has found he is most comfortable communicating with others on Snapchat, under the name “ryrothedino”.