Hi, my name is Jacob Seville, I’m a third-year arts management major, and I’m the Vice President of Ohio State Tap Dancing Club, known to most people as the better club dedicated to tap dancing on campus. Don’t trust what their propaganda tells you, Buckeye Tap Society is just a bunch of pretentious assholes and they give people who enjoy tap dancing a bad name.
My first argument against them is that they only tap dance to jazz music. Like, are you even trying to have fun? I mean, jazz is fine I guess but, like, last semester we did a really sweet routine to Best Day of my Life and everybody loved it. My mom told me it was the best tap dance routine she’d ever seen.
Another point against them is that they refuse to call tap dancing by its name, instead calling it “tap”. My theory is that to them calling it dancing associates it with a lesser art form. Um, newsflash pompous jerkwads, dancing is pretty cool. I mean, like, obviously tap dancing is the coolest type, but there was that one black ballerina too, she was pretty neat. And the people in that swing dance club seem to enjoy what they do and that’s what matters.
Thirdly, I’d like to point out that they do competitive tap dancing, while Ohio State Tap Dancing Club is open to everybody. Well, I guess they’re open to anybody too. And, like, I guess the competitions are optional. But like, even the fact that they do them is pretentious. I mean who does that? You have to be cool and relatable. Like last semester we did a really sweet routine to Best Day of My Life and everybody loved it.
So that’s why you should join Ohio State Tap Dancing Club instead of those holier-than-thou try-hards at Buckeye Tap.
Rebuttal
Hey I’m Clancy Raines, the President of Buckeye Tap Society. Ohio State Tap Dancing club is pretty cool I guess.
–Allan, Senior Staff Member