Category 2023-24

Horrifying! Everyone at This Frat Party Knows I Don’t Normally Wear Hats

Abraham Lincoln once said, “No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.” A true hat-wearer, I’m convinced he was talking about me, 164 years later, standing in the backyard of Theta Xi Sigma Alpha Male Chapter,… Continue Reading →

The Death of Twink Death: Keebler Elf Birth

In a world of doom, gloom, and capitalism, the pursuit of being young is at the forefront of people’s minds. This pressure is highest for gay men—especially twinks. Twink Death is the phenomenon describing the point in time when a… Continue Reading →

Ohio State Nerds To Go Into Mourning

As spring break approaches, members of the Ohio State community are excited to take a break from their studies and catch a flight to a tropical destination to forget all of their troubles for a week. However, for a certain… Continue Reading →

5 Ways to Cope When Overwhelmed in Lecture

Surely, we’ve all been there at least once: a long lecture in Smith Labs, where most of your classmates are malodorous engineering majors. It never fails, does it? As if it could get any worse, the person to your right… Continue Reading →

Ohio State Dance Team Replaced By Another Group as the United States National Team

After the recent announcement that The Ohio State University’s Dance Team would be representing Team USA in both the Jazz & Pom categories at the ICU World Championships in Spring, dance fans around the world were shocked to see that… Continue Reading →

Top 9 Clubs to Join on Ohio State’s Campus

Underage Drinking Club A fun social club for incoming freshmen (absolutely not a trap by OSUPD)! Plenty of awesome meetings where they discuss who sells the best fakes, what liquor stores don’t card, and the best places on campus to… Continue Reading →

Swipes and Surveillance: Inside My Orwellian Experience at Scott Traditions

One of these nights, I was up late at night doing what every lonely Buckeye soul does: browsing the depths of r/OSU. Amidst the questions that are really for advisors, and Redditors unsuccessfully asking for “who is throwing tonight”, I… Continue Reading →

Top 10 Worst Places To Wake Up on OSU’s Main Campus

A Male Philosophy Major’s Dorm Room “No man’s knowledge here can go beyond his experience”, the latter of which we’re sure your philosophical pal lacks. The Bottom of Mirror Lake Pal, the jumps into Mirror Lake were stopped years ago…… Continue Reading →

Match the real google review to the dining hall!

1) ★☆☆☆☆ “Avoid this place like you would Chernobyl. In fact, it is probably healthier for you to get radiation poisoning directly than to gradually develop it by eating the food here. The level of indigestion i have experienced from… Continue Reading →

President Carter Introduces New Debt-Free Tuition Plan

COLUMBUS, OH – Continuing the legacy of his predecessor at today’s press conference, Ohio State President Ted Carter spoke today to reporters his direct plan to encourage low-income Ohio students to seek out an often-expensive university degree. “We’re very glad… Continue Reading →

Top Five Worst Times to Find Out Study Rooms Aren’t Soundproof

1. After Ranting About Your Latest Breakup Picture this: You’ve sat down with your friends after class and begun spilling your guts about your ex-boyfriend. Sure, it lasted a weekend, but that isn’t the point. You’ve gone over every dirty… Continue Reading →

Top 5 Things to Do While Being Sexiled

This February love is in the air, and lovers are in your mutual living space! If you are one of the unfortunate souls who gets to watch your roommate be enthralled in the passion of a two-month-long relationship with the… Continue Reading →

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