ABERCROMBIE & FITCH EMERGENCY CENTER, COLUMBUS- It’s that time of year again! Ohio State students are finally returning to campus after a restful summer break, and what better way to ring in a new semester than the Abercrombie and Fitch… Continue Reading →
To be frank, although I’m part of the working class, I don’t give a damn about the plight of the proletariat. Nor do I care about punishing the bourgeoisie, or anyone else decried in the Communist Manifesto. What I do… Continue Reading →
There’s no speed limit on the Oval, so feel free to put the pedal to the metal! For male students, using an umbrella is regarded as a clear sign of homosexuality. The highest rates of depression recorded on campus belong… Continue Reading →
Dear Buckeyes, As the summer sun reluctantly begins its descent, we can already hear the collective sighs of pool floaties and ice cream trucks bidding farewell to their seasonal reign. But fear not, for here at The Ohio State University,… Continue Reading →
Kristina M. Johnson was forced to resign after her affair with Monica Lewinsky went public. Most incidents of academic misconduct investigated by COAM are attributed to students visiting coolmathgames.com CampusParc is a scam. The North Campus Clock Tower was a… Continue Reading →
With the Autumn 2023 semester right around the corner, some newcomers may be afraid of the idea of a roommate. It can be very scary rooming with someone you’ve never met before, especially if you’re naturally introverted. Here are five… Continue Reading →
William Oxley Thompson, Ohio State’s fifth president, did not speak English. 81 percent of students in the Fisher College of Business admit to picking their major after watching The Wolf of Wall Street. Due to a football shortage, the 1953… Continue Reading →
I saw in a recent edition of The Lantern that the Tom W. Davis Clock Tower on North Campus has been named the 8th Wonder of the World. Good; it definitely deserves the title. Now let me tell you why…. Continue Reading →
Congrats, you’re officially a Buckeye! Your first semester is going to be great, we promise – but it can also be a little difficult if you don’t have the right support system. That’s why we’ve compiled a list of the… Continue Reading →
After months of bullying and harassment by Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, Disney has had enough. Earlier this week the entertainment company announced they would be relocating Walt Disney World from Orlando to The Ohio State University’s Columbus campus. “We’re truly… Continue Reading →
Earlier this week, Ohio State University administrators commented on a recent report detailing the student mental health crisis on campus. “While we commiserate with our students and feel some sympathy for them, we see no reason to expend more of… Continue Reading →
How to get laid if you’re a Guy: Step 1) Learn to Moonwalk. It’s probably the sexiest dance move of all time. Just imagine Moonwalking across the Midway dancefloor; no girl (or guy!) will be able to say no to… Continue Reading →
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