Category Sundial Originals

Sundial Reviews Hotel Transylvania 3

A few words come to mind when I think of Hotel Transylvania 3. Visceral. Pensive. Incendiary. But beyond the surface-level comedy and the sweeping romance, I think we ought to appreciate this movie for what it truly is: an art… Continue Reading →

Radical Feminists to Replace Jack-O-Lanterns with Jess-O-Lanterns in Act of Reverse Sexism

After decades of eating away at our traditional values, the Lactating Left has done it again! The feminists and gender non-contorting queero’s have advanced yet another front on American masculinity. When will this war on men end??? After immense pressure… Continue Reading →

“Hell Not That Bad,” Says Recently Deceased Dad

It was a strange scene, to be sure. Hugh Gusman, the father of three and insistent-wearer of jean shorts, recently found his soul in the Unholy Abyss last Thursday after experiencing death: a not-uncommon way to die. Contrary to the… Continue Reading →

How to Summon Satan for Better Grades

With both Halloween and midterms coming up, it may seem tempting and thematically appropriate to sell your soul in order to get good grades. If that sounds like a choice you’d like to make, it is important that you know how to do… Continue Reading →

Local Homeless Shelter Donating Human Skin to Homeless Skeletons

HELL, MICHIGAN — A lot of people spend Scary Christmas, better known as Halloween to mortals, filled with skin and organs, but not everyone has a scalp on their head. This is why Pumpkin Street Mission Ministries opened its doors… Continue Reading →

The Top 4 Cringeworthy Ways You Came Out Of The Closet When You Were 14

The mere notion of being in a society in which one can come out as a young teenager might appear to be an idyllic paradise to older queer people. However, as an actual real-life young person, you know that every… Continue Reading →

Unemployment at All-Time Low in Smoking Crater That Used to Be a Nation

According to an exciting study released in the presidential fallout shelter this week, unemployment in the radioactive wasteland that was once the United States has fallen to a historic low. The study, the first in America’s history to get responses… Continue Reading →

McDonald’s Unveils New Memorial Sandwich: The McCain

You’ve tried the McRib and you’ve lined up for the Szechuan sauce, but this week, McDonald’s unveiled their viral creation: the McCain, an All-American burger for All-American white men, featuring a signature grill mark in the shape of Senator John… Continue Reading →

Student Embarks on 2nd Buck-I-Serv Trip to Renew Token Profile Picture with African Child

KUMASI, GHANA–For Chaz Wick, an extremely premed neuroscience major, summer means service. Along with other Ohio State students, Chaz has traveled to operate a volunteer-run medical clinic in rural Ghana for the second summer in a row. “I’ve faced a… Continue Reading →

Strategies for Expeditious Comprehension in Literature

English 2948 Strategies for Expeditious Comprehension in Literature WF 2:20-3:40 PM Spring 2018, 234 Denny Hall   Instructor: Sallie Brockenfuller                                    E-mail: brockenfuller.37@osu.edu Office:… Continue Reading →

Website Gods Grant Us With New Website

The Website Gods taketh, but they also giveth.   THE SUNDIAL HEADQUARTERS—disappointed by our attempted insurgency to refill Mirror Lake, the Great Gods of online comedy struck down our beautiful website at sundial.osu.edu and left us scrambling in the desert…. Continue Reading →

From Skirts to Cargo Shorts: American Girl Targets a New Audience

American Girl dolls have been a part of American pop culture for decades. First arising in 1986, the company sold dolls of girls along with books describing the inspiring stories of the characters these dolls represented. These were some of… Continue Reading →

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