GARY, INDIANA — A spooky scandal has once again rocked the quiet streets of Gary this October. Maximillian Bader, who months ago shot to international fame after his claims to be dating a ghost named Creepy Cathy, was recently proven… Continue Reading →
COLUMBUS—It’s that time of year again; the leaves begin to change colors and millions everywhere flock to their local Starbucks to enjoy their favorite seasonal cash grab—The Pumpkin Spice Latte. But this fall you may want to reconsider where you… Continue Reading →
An incredible event took place earlier this week at Thompson Library when the ghost of former Ohio State president, William Oxley Thompson, returned from the afterlife. According to multiple witnesses, Thompson’s first words were, “Wow, this place has really gone… Continue Reading →
Dear Amy, I signed up to volunteer at a local Trunk or Treat, but don’t have the money to buy candy. What do I do? Sincerely, Frighteningly Frugal Dear Frighteningly Frugal, Look around your house for some candy alternatives,… Continue Reading →
The dead aren’t the only things rising this fall at OSU. The students taking “Advanced Human Anatomy for Undergraduates” were in for a big surprise when a UPO (Unidentified Phallic Object) was spotted inside the classroom. After this mysterious entity… Continue Reading →
Dear Amy, I was so ready for Halloween this year. My girlfriend and I bought our Halloween couples costume weeks ago and I was super excited to show all of our friends just how cute we are. The problem? My… Continue Reading →
A few words come to mind when I think of Hotel Transylvania 3. Visceral. Pensive. Incendiary. But beyond the surface-level comedy and the sweeping romance, I think we ought to appreciate this movie for what it truly is: an art… Continue Reading →
After decades of eating away at our traditional values, the Lactating Left has done it again! The feminists and gender non-contorting queero’s have advanced yet another front on American masculinity. When will this war on men end??? After immense pressure… Continue Reading →
It was a strange scene, to be sure. Hugh Gusman, the father of three and insistent-wearer of jean shorts, recently found his soul in the Unholy Abyss last Thursday after experiencing death: a not-uncommon way to die. Contrary to the… Continue Reading →
With both Halloween and midterms coming up, it may seem tempting and thematically appropriate to sell your soul in order to get good grades. If that sounds like a choice you’d like to make, it is important that you know how to do… Continue Reading →
HELL, MICHIGAN — A lot of people spend Scary Christmas, better known as Halloween to mortals, filled with skin and organs, but not everyone has a scalp on their head. This is why Pumpkin Street Mission Ministries opened its doors… Continue Reading →
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