Category Valentine’s Day Zine (2024)

Ted Carter Sleeps With Pajamas On Inside Out to Invoke Snow Day

Ahead of the inclement weather headed into Columbus on Monday, campus officials canceled all in-person classes. Students and staff alike all celebrated–Apparently, this is one of only 20 times it’s happened since that famous episode in ‘78! Even University President… Continue Reading →

Top 5 Things to Do While Being Sexiled

This February love is in the air, and lovers are in your mutual living space! If you are one of the unfortunate souls who gets to watch your roommate be enthralled in the passion of a two-month-long relationship with the… Continue Reading →

Spotted: Brutus and Ted Carter on Romantic Valentine’s Day Date at Mirror Lake

After recent footage surfaced to the Sundial of Ted Carter and beloved mascot Brutus Buckeye taking a romantic walk around Mirror Lake at night, complete with holding hands and french kissing underneath the lights, students have been curious to see… Continue Reading →

Man Who Was Freshly Dumped Takes Bold Stance Against Valentine’s Day

With Valentine’s Day today, many students all over campus have been bitten by the lovebug. However, it seems that some have hired an exterminator. Q Pid, a junior in the Psychology department, has recently taken a fierce oppositional stance to… Continue Reading →

Valentine’s Day: A Poetry Anthology

Scarlet is red, Michigan sucks, I have a fake, Join me at Bull’s? /// How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My hand can reach, when embracing… Continue Reading →

OPINION: The Media is Taking the Romance Too Far

I think the Superbowl is taking the Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce thing too far. There. I said it. It’s not because I hate Taylor Swift, because I don’t. They could never make me hate her (except for the insane… Continue Reading →

OPINION: Become More Delusional about Your Classroom Crush

Valentine’s Day is upon us and so is the intense yearning and longing for someone to just love you back during these cold winter months. You’ve tried dating apps and dating your friends; now try a random man in your… Continue Reading →

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