The letter. The telegram. 3am texts that just say “u up?” All these once great ways to talk to people have been sent to obscurity by the passage of time. And the smartphone – a seemingly unstoppable form of communication – will soon join them as it gets replaced with technology’s next evolution: the bananaphone.
It seems unlikely, but one bold entrepreneur, Calvin Raffy, thinks the way we talk to each other is ripe for change.
“I don’t know about you guys, but I have this very specific issue where I get hungry right as I start to end conversations with people,” Raffy explained to the attendants of CommCon2021, the biggest event for up and coming tech companies everywhere. “And I thought, why not take care of both at once! A phone you can eat!”
Raffy then pulled out what at first appeared to be a single banana, but when he told the crowd to call his number, it was ring ring ring ring ring ring ringing like no phone had ever rung before! The crowd was already shocked, but they were left dumbfounded when Raffy answered the banana, said “watch this,” and swallowed the entire thing in a single forceful gulp.
It’s safe to say experts were amazed.
“I don’t think you understand, this revolutionizes privacy, language, and even my lunch!” Daniel Driver, a data scientist who calls Silicon Valley home, told us. “Ordinarily, phones can be tracked by third parties, but the acid in your stomach is more than sufficient to safely destroy the phone, rendering it untraceable!”
Driver anticipates banana phones to completely dominate the market within 10 years, adding “the only issue left to solve is preventing someone else from taking your phone while you’re talking and eating it.”
Written by Zach Levy, Vice President