Michigan J. Frog, remembered mainly for his role in 1955’s One Froggy Evening and for being a supporting cast member of the Looney Tunes, died on November 11th, 2022 in an aggravated assault accident. Frog had been entertaining America for 67 years. He brought laughter and joy to children through his stint in the “Merrie Melodies” film series. When the Sundial reached out to Bugs Bunny for a comment, he said “We all really loved Michigan. You could see him light up a room whenever he was asked to perform the Michigan Rag. He lived a long and fruitful life, a life which was unfortunately cut too short.”
Mr. Frog was found outside of the Wexner Center for the Arts, squashed by a sophomore who claims that he “didn’t like his name because it reminds him of The Team Up North.” When asked what team this was, he responded “you know, that team” and walked away. We here at the Sundial do not know what team this sophomore was referring to so we can only assume the student’s actions were justified because a name like that would incite a violent rage in anyone.
Despite this, morale for the game is still high on campus. “Why would I care about a frog?” says OSU senior Rhodri Parker. When asked about the incident, Brutus Buckeye said “WOOO GO BUCKS! Muck Fichigan!” and proceeded to do his funny little head punch. Classic Brutus. And the Sundial’s own, Vice President Henry Levenberg, said that he did not really care at all about this story because his “…mom never let him watch Looney Tunes”.
This matter has also raised concern for the safety of students on campus. Sure, many students on campus are taller than four inches and cannot get squashed by a size 9 shoe, but safety is always of the utmost importance. When asked about the matter, Kristina Johnson had this to say. “I cannot assure the safety of any Michigan related thing on this campus, animated frog or not. In fact, whenever any blue and yellow even glances at each other, I send out my team of stompers to take care of them and by take care of them I mean stomp them. Can we get rid of that last part?”
We here at the Sundial would like to offer our condolences to Michigan J. Frog’s family. If you or anyone that you know is in danger of being stomped, please contact our toll free number below so we can get you in touch with the correct authorities to deal with this issue.
Stomping Security and Safety Number: (614) 292-2715
Written by Julian Rodgers, Staff Writer