Looking up from the computer monitor after several minutes of frustrated clicking, esteemed Ohio State University professor Julia Pierce inquired if any of her students knew how to access the files on her flash drive. “Can someone help me get to my memory stick on the computer?” said Pierce, who has a PhD in English Literature and absolutely no knowledge of how to perform menial computer tasks despite using the device on a daily basis. “Are any of you good with technology? Any computer science majors in here?” Witnesses reported that a student—a mere English major—finally stood up to help and was impressively able to solve the problem with just two clicks of the mouse. Professor Pierce applauded the young man, calling him a “computer expert” in front of 30 of his peers.

Less than twenty minutes later, the computer outsmarted Professor Pierce again when she could not get a YouTube video to play. Sources divulged that the window said “Internet Explorer cannot display the webpage” for at least five whole minutes. “Usually I love when my professors waste class time, but this was even more unbearable than actually learning,” said the class computer expert, who would not provide his name out of embarrassment. He eventually had mercy on his professor and explained to her that she needed to enter her university username and password in order to gain access to the WiFi. “I can’t believe that worked,” Pierce said as though this was her first day teaching at Ohio State. After class, students could be seen quickly filing out of the classroom before their desperate professor could ask any of them where the off switch was on the computer.

Ashley Helal, Staff Member