1. Anything with “best friend”
• “OMG 1,2,4,7,8,14,21 are so us!!!”
2. Anything with “roommate”
• “LMAO at 6! By the way we need to have a serious meeting. When can you get on fb chat?”
3. Something about your favorite show
• Let’s hang out and stare in the same direction and not talk
4. Something about your favorite anything
• “I can’t believe other people are as passionate about dogs with human bodies as you are!”
5. Things only [you] will understand
• I get you. Let me show you how much I get you through Facebook.
6. A serious article about your favorite cause
• Isn’t that whole thing with that rebellion and/or revolution in that country I can’t pronounce devastating/inspirational? I’m informed.
7. Anything that has to do with the state you live in
• Look how many shows and movies are set in Ohio! Maybe they’ll make one about our vastly uninteresting lives!
8. An intervention in disguise
• Haha I’m making light of your serious motivation problem!
9. Something blatantly for the sake of ogling hot guys
• It’s not misogyny if it’s misandry!
10. Anything having to do with the decade in which you were born, specifically such that only you would remember, apparently
• Thus explaining why the past thirteen years have been a total blur to you.
11. Cats
• Cats
12. [number] [witty observation] [reader hook]
• [quip]
-Bri Forney, Senior Staff-Writer