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Michigan Sign-Stealing Scandal UPDATE: Ohio State Play Signs Found on Hunter Biden’s Laptop

Written by TPUSA Earlier this week, Ohio State University officials released files from Hunter Biden’s laptop implicating the president’s son in yet another shocking scandal. Hunter had apparently taken his personal laptop to the university Tech Hub for repairs when… Continue Reading →

Would You Be Able to Get An Abortion in Ohio? (A Quiz)

Written by The Rizzler Answer these questions to the best of your ability to see if you would be able to get an abortion in the state of Ohio.  1. Do you have a uterus?  A. Yes  B. No  2…. Continue Reading →

New Duo Push Voting Mandate Causes Confusion at Polls

Written by Abe Ortion Chaos ensued at early voting polls this morning all over the city of Columbus as 65,000 Columbus voters were turned away due to issues with the digital authorization app Duo Push. A recently enacted policy requires… Continue Reading →

These are the 10 Best Halloween Costume Ideas of the Year!

10) Midway Bouncer Bulging biceps complemented by a black t-shirt three sizes too small, a permanent scowl, and don’t forget the mandatory sunglasses! 9) Oval Abortion Protester Tinfoil hats, “Let’s Go Brandon” shirts, and comically large posters of “fetuses” that… Continue Reading →

Ohio State’s plan to convert the Ohio Union into a Spirit Halloween

By Emma Lambert This past Tuesday, acting president of The Ohio State University, Peter Mohler, and incoming president, Ted Carter Jr. have announced their joint decision to convert the Ohio Union into a Spirit Halloween just in time for the… Continue Reading →

ATTENTION SOPHOMORES: These are the Best Ways to Spend your STEP Money!

By Jordan Belfort Here are the five best Second-year Transformers Experience Program (STEP) project ideas!  5) Buy Scarlet and Gray hoodies for all the squirrels on campus What could be better than giving back to your community? Show your school… Continue Reading →

Ohio State Professor Interviews the Mexican Alien Mummies

By Giorgio A. Tsoukalos Last night, students attending Dr. Steven Brown’s special seminar on the Mexican Alien Mummies were shocked when the renowned professor introduced two special guests: the Mexican Alien Mummies themselves.  Dr. Brown:  Welcome, welcome! It’s great to… Continue Reading →

Got COAMed? Better Call Saul!

By James Morgan McGill Have you been COAMed? Then you’d better call Saul! Not only will he make the charges disappear, he’ll also make sure COAM starts investigating the professor who wrongfully reported you! Has your frat been suspended after… Continue Reading →

Sundial’s Official Spooktober Horoscope

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18): This Halloween night, dear Aquarius, it’s your job to traumatize as many young trick-or-treaters with your scary costume as possible. Send ‘em straight to the psych ward! Pisces (February 19 – March 20): Look… Continue Reading →

Ohio State Raises Tuition to Fund Controversial Death Star Program

In a surprising move this weekend, Incoming University President Ted Carter announced a 66% tuition increase for all students, regardless of enrolled credit hours or financial aid needed. “I know you cheapskates aren’t going to be too happy with this… Continue Reading →

R. L. Stine Turns 80: Celebrating the Beloved Author’s Birthday

This Sunday, October 8th, marks the 80th birthday of one of Ohio State’s best-loved graduates. Robert Lawrence Stine was born in 1943 right here in Columbus, and grew up in the inner suburb of Bexley. He graduated from Ohio State… Continue Reading →

Thompson Statue to be Removed, Replaced with Statue of R. L. Stine

Ohio State students were shocked last week when University Archives released the secret diary of William Oxley Thompson, who served as Ohio State’s fifth president from 1899 to 1925. The diary, which had remained hidden from the public for nearly… Continue Reading →

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