Written by Holden Klym
With finals wrapping up, students on campus are desperate to make the most of their campus meal plans before leaving for Winter Break.
This places an extra toll on OSU’s indentured servants—sorry, student employees—that are forced to put together GrubHub orders at an impossibly fast rate.
We went on the scene to ask an anonymous Curl Market employee what they thought of the rush:
“Half the time they’re ordering so many things that we’re out of what they want. It doesn’t help that students use fake names, and then I look like an idiot asking Penelope Tinkle if regular Coke is okay instead of diet.”
Following our interview, we found an angry, Lulu-Lemon-clad, student asking the employees why her order wasn’t ready yet. The student in question, was the very real Penelope Tinkle.
It had been 29 seconds since she first placed her order, but GrubHub told her the 14-swipe meal would be ready 3 hours ago. WHAT?! How dare they make her, someone who hasn’t worked a day in her life, wait this long!
We stepped in before the daggers in her eyes could actually kill the Student Manager, to ask Tinkle if she knew what her peers had to go through at their student job.
Her response was simply, “No, why would I?” before explaining that 14 swipes isn’t that big of a deal. We later discovered she has 8 Scarlet-14 meal plans, to fulfill the 8-person housing contract her father pays for her to get her own suite in Blackburn.
Since she is technically 8 separate students, she can only use up to 14 per order, since the other swipes are attached to other name.numbers.
“It can’t be that hard,” complained Tinkle, “Imagine if I could use all 112!”